Finish a first draft of a novel

I’ve had less time this week to think and reflect. But that’s ok; there is a good reason for it. I’ve fallen a tiny bit behind on one of my larger goals—finishing the first draft of a novel—which I am to have by the middle of June this year.

2023 is the year I’ll get that draft finished, and assuming it’s good enough, I also hope to have at least one complete revision and—as a stretch goal—share it with someone else. Right now, I’m just starting, or maybe I should say, I’m getting re-started. The idea I’m working on has been bouncing around in my head for years now, and I’ve made a few attempts at starting it, trying out different methods of outlining prep work and methodologies to try and get it going. It’s never entirely worked. Every time I start strong, I lose steam as the plot problems pile up.

The prevailing advice on writing your first draft is to power through, and I think that’s good advice, but it’s been a struggle for me. Last time life got in the way, and I lost the thread. Most times, I run out of steam. This time, though, I am going to power through and finish. I’m not even worried if it’s good or if I want to continue when I’ve hit the end of that first draft. I want to finish, and that’s my goal.

So what’s my story about? I’m not quite ready to share the details, but it’s an urban meets high fantasy tale with some extensive world-building behind it. Having said that, this particular story is, I hope, strongly character driven with a coming-of-age theme wrapped in a supernatural mystery framing. It sounds generic, but I think it’s got some original aspects and a unique spin. If I can execute—big if, heh—then I think it’ll be familiar but also new.

Photowalking

Hello Journal! This last week was a bit weird, with many different things contributing to a low level of anxiety and stress. Thankfully it didn’t get to me all that much, and I was able to be mindful of it in a way that allowed me to work through it and even find some flow along the way.

One thing that helped me a lot was getting outside, which I do most days, but in a kind semi-mindful habit type of way: exercise, walking the dog, etc. I’ve developed some strong, and I think, helpful habits around getting outside daily. But this week, as an attempt to combat anxiety, I tried to get out more than usual, and I also added activities designed to try and help me relax and break cycles of circular thinking and worry.

One of those things I did almost every day when I was younger—Photowalking. It is precisely what you’d expect. Go outside for some walking, bring a camera and take some photos. It combines light exercise, sunlight, and the outdoors with a simple creation activity.

I think it helped quite a bit, and I’m glad I did it. Below are some of the photos I captured. I used my Moment macro lens, and I really wanted to slow down and capture some of the small details around my yard and my neighborhood. Relecting, this act was a distraction from my anxiety but also a project that forced me to notice small, interesting things around me and use them to make something.

Experiments with Midjourney

Good morning, Journal. Today I’ve got a lot on my mind, and even more on my to-do list, but I' wanted to share some of the work I’ve been doing with AI. Much of these are proof of concept pieces, as I learn the boundaries of Midjourney and explore some concepts. I’ve begun to sketch out a project that I think will be interesting and a great way to learn, but also touch on a few of my interests in an entertaining way. More on that in future.

I’ll just leave these here. For now.

Jibaro

A fascinating inside look into Jibaro, the incredible animated short from Alberto Mielgo. I highly suggest watching the actual film before you dive into the inside look. Beware, though, that it’s a bit disturbing.

“Jibaro is like a brutal disaster.” ~ Director Alberto Mielgo

What a ride! Jibaro, the last episode from season three of Love, Death + Robots, is unlike anything I’ve ever watched. I’m a big fan of the series and short-form animation, but Jibaro blew my mind.

Its frenetic pace, quick jump-cuts, and wild motion design could be off-putting for some, and there are some disturbing and extremely violent stretches, but I found the whole thing beautiful. A brutal disaster indeed. The model design, art direction, sound direction, motion design, etc., is fantastic and pushes the envelope of what animation can do.

It’s realistic-ish, living in an uncanny valley with the characters, but seemingly done very purposefully. You want to relate to the characters and the story of this toxic relationship if that’s what it is, but only just enough. Jibaro rides the edge perfectly between fantastic realism and absurd surrealism. Alberto Mielgo and his team have made something incredible.

Keep a won’t do list

Many years ago, when I was working as an associate editor for Lifehacker—one of a few jobs I had back then, I was a bit of a hustler—I wrote an article about a practice I was very fond of: the creation and keeping of a won’t do list. I couldn’t find that article anywhere, and I’ve since lost the practice, but as the general idea keeps coming up wherever I look, I thought I’d revisit it.

It’s not a complicated idea and is underrated; the gist is this: I make and keep a list of all the things I will not do. The idea here is to be aware of all the things that come into my day-to-day and be diligent about what makes it onto my to-do list.

It’s easy and can help bring focus onto the things that matter. It fits nicely with some of my 2023 goals, mainly not letting others dictate my time and being more proactive with my energy. And it works well alongside the mantra of “Embrace, learn, and grow stronger” as it can be reflected from time to time. It could contain concrete things I’m interested in stopping/quitting or, more general, like bad habits I’d like to work on.

Simply putting the list together and thinking about what I want to spend my time and energy on is extremely valuable. I can’t say the list itself is all that useful except to reflect upon, but it’s a relatively good device to help me be more mindful about what I’m spending time on.

My list has become a bit specific and personal, so I won’t share it all here, but here are a few choice examples:

• Won’t finish “x” project or book

• Won’t waste time looking at social media

• Won’t eat ice cream after 8 pm

• Won’t respond to that one email

• Etc.

I’ve found that quite a few things that have made it to this list are things other people try to put there. Because of this, I added, “won’t let people add to my to-do list.”

Sometimes not doing something is the best way to get things done. I’ve found this helpful in the past, and I think it’s a good practice to get into, if for no other reason than to see all the things I could be doing and better gauge how to do those things I want to do.

How to achieve flow

One of the primary reasons I started this journal was to get back into a creation habit. And one of the reasons I want to get that habit of creation going again is so I can more easily get into a flow state.

Why flow? Well, it feels good, and it’s good for you. In his seminal book on the subject Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi describes flow as “a state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter; the experience is so enjoyable that people will continue to do it even at great cost, for the sheer sake of doing it.” Essentially, flow is a key ingredient in lasting happiness.

Csikszentmihalyi asserts that happiness can be achieved, practiced, and achieved easier over time as one learns to get into flow. In my experience, this is true, but it’s not the only benefit to getting into flow. It’s also a great way to get things done.

It’s been many years since I’ve read the book, and, candidly, I found it dry and difficult to read, let alone enjoy, but he does outline the “how to” in getting into flow. The following is a bit rough, but I have been taking some notes on flow as I’ve been reading Ikigai and refreshing myself on Csikszentmihalyi’s work.

Conditions needed to achieve flow:

1. Know what you’re doing. Note: this doesn’t mean you need to be a master, only that you know how to do what you’re doing. Learning can be a good way to get into flow.

2. Understand how well you’re doing through feedback. Essentially, noticing your progress.

3. Engage in a task that has you somewhat challenged, at least enough to absorb your attention in the task at hand. Ideally, such that your action and attention are working together.

4. Find a distraction-free environment and have control over what you are doing at all times.

Strategies for flow

• Choose something challenging but not too difficult. You want to enter the uncomfort zone but with something doable.

• Have a clear objective. You don’t need a map to your goal but a compass. You should know where you want to be and what to do, but you don’t need the course mapped out. Have a clear objective focusing on the process, but don’t obsess over the details or the finished product. The idea is to plan and then do the work. Reflect on what you hope to achieve: What is my objective for today’s session? How many words am I going to write?

• Concentrate on one thing at a time. Multitasking is not effective. Distractions are deadly. Concentrating on one thing at a time might be the most important aspect of achieving flow. People suck at multitasking, and you can’t multitask and also be in flow. Context switching drains energy, makes us less effective, more stressed, more error-prone, retaining less information, etc. This is especially true for complex areas requiring domain knowledge, deep thinking, and creative work.

• Look for “mircroflows”—the art of doing and enjoying simple tasks. Things like washing the dishes, painting, running errands, etc. Most of us do this, even if we aren’t aware of it.

• Cultivate a meditation practice. There's not much to say about this; it’s a great way to clear the deck and prepare yourself for flow. Looking back at 2022, a year I slipped out of the habit of daily meditation, I wonder how much that affected my inability to resist distraction.

• Embrace ritual. Rituals help flow by providing clear objectives and rules guiding people towards goals. An unclear expectation or goal is one of the hardest things to deal with in work-life. Rituals or processes—so often derided as a bad word—can help not only with the steps and subsets that give us a path to follow but in clearing up expectations, often to the realization that the goal is unattainable or otherwise not worth pursuing. In my life and projects, both work and personal, rituals of starting is often enough to unblock even the trickiest problems.

Flow can be trained, and one of the best ways to do that is to begin recognizing those things in your life that place you into a flow state. But that’s not all; in the book Ikigai, the authors assert that finding your flow(s) can lead to finding your Ikigai—your purpose in life. Another interesting tip from Ikigai is to leverage similar activities to those you enjoy. Especially if you are good at something, if painting gets you into flow, you can try photography.

Here’s a list of things that put me into a state of flow:

• Snowboarding

• Walking. But only if I’m only walking and not doing anything else. Walking is one of the things I feel ok multitasking, but only if the other thing I’m doing is the focus. Even then, it’s not nearly as effective or enjoyable as it would be on its own. But that’s a whole other topic.

• Writing, sometimes, if I’m either freewriting or the topic is clear in my mind.

• Making art. I’m not a good artist, but I find that making art can quickly put me into a flow state that lasts for a long time. It feels good to make art. Incidentally, this is one reason I don’t think AI art will ever replace human artists. Humans like to make art.

• Making maps. Probably the same as making art but a bit more specific.

• DJing. More than just listening to music, picking out the songs and syncing the beats can lift me into a flow state.

• Cleaning or yard work, but only if there is a fairly large job to do.

• Video games, but only for short-ish stretches.

Ikigai by Héctor García & Francesc Miralles

⭐⭐⭐⭐

File under: Better Living

As a resolution for the new year, I plan to spend some time each day reading non-fiction. Primary of the type I feel like I can glean practical learnings from to bring into my day-to-day life. The first is a book I started over the holiday break: Ikigai by Héctor García & Francesc Miralles.

Ikigai is about finding your purpose and putting that purpose into practice for a long, healthy, and happy life. It’s small—an easy read—filled with lots of practical nuggets and insight.

The word “Ikigai” is Japanese and translates roughly to “a reason for living.”

The authors argue that everyone has an ikigai or a sense of purpose in life and that finding and living following one's ikigai can bring a sense of fulfillment and happiness well into advanced age.

For me, this was a bit of a challenging read. Not due to the writing style, length, or anything like that. I identify with much of what the authors talk about, but I have always felt lacking in an easily identifiable purpose. It’s one of the reasons I picked this one up. I have reasons to live but feel a bit lost when I think about things like my “life’s work” or an underlying reason for living. I imagine that feeling is pretty familiar to many.

The book draws on the authors' experiences and research, as well as on the stories and practices of people from Japan and other countries, to present a comprehensive guide to finding and living one's ikigai. In particular, I enjoyed all the interviews and anecdotes from the centenarians in Okinawa. The latter chapters cover foods, exercise, and lifestyle. I’ve noted to dig deeper into those, especially the exercise. The practice of Radio Taiso, especially, seems interesting to me. I like to get moving early in the day, and I almost always wake up sore, so I think I could benefit from something like that.

To sum it up, Ikigai is a thought-provoking and inspiring book that encourages us to think deeply about our sense of purpose and to take steps to align our lives with it. It offers practical advice and guidance on how to find and pursue one's ikigai.

Your mind has a mind of its own

‍For Christmas, my wife printed out this fun little poem by author, director, and producer Todd Strauss-Shulson and stuffed it into the kid’s stockings. It’s from a children’s book he wrote—Your Mind Makes Thoughts Like Your Butt Makes Farts—and, despite the silly title, there is some beautiful wisdom here.

Your mind has a mind of its own.
It’s chatting and yapping when you’re out or at home.

It thinks it’s in charge, it’s making demands.
Like “Sleep a bit later” or “Don’t wash your hands.”
It yells “I don’t like you!” or “You’re doing great!”
It might make you laugh – or make your heart ache.

But the things that it says are not always true,
Your mind makes up thoughts like your tongue makes you drool.
Like your nose makes snot, like your butt farts a lot,
Your mind has a mind of its own.

If ever your mind gets too angry or sad,
Too noisy, or swirly, or says “everything’s bad,”
No need to believe it, don’t feel so alone
Just let your mind have a mind of its own.

But how do you do it? It’s such a hard task.
The trick is to remember, thoughts just don’t last.

Your mind’s just a friend like your nose, tongue, and butt;
You don’t have to get scared when it starts to erupt.
You can watch it, be friendly, wave as thoughts pass on through.
Say “Hi thought! How are ya! How do you do?”

Thoughts won’t stay forever; they’ll just move right on by
Like a fish in the river or a bird in the sky
Your mind will think thoughts, but you don’t have to believe ‘em
Or get lost in judging, comparing, daydreamin.’

So don’t get so thrown when your mind starts to roam.
If you’re paying attention, you can bring it right home.
You’re lucky your mind has a mind of its own.

We don’t always have control over our minds and what comes up throughout the day. Trying to force control is hardly a good idea, as it doesn’t work and can draw you into an unpleasant spiral. In my experience, when unhelpful or unpleasant thoughts arise in your mind, it’s best to acknowledge them and move on.

The mind is going to do what it’s going to do. And that’s alright.

The Empress of Salt and Fortune by Nghi Vo

⭐⭐⭐⭐

File under: Fantasy

Wizard-level reading challenge: Book under 200 words

The Empress of Salt and Fortune by Nghi Vo tells the tale of its namesake, a young queen from the northern kingdom who is sent south for a political marriage after the country lost its war with the south. It’s a short story, told with exquisite and ephemeral prose woven from multiple viewpoints and across timelines, an engaging take on the frame narrative.

I enjoyed this quite a bit. It’s set in a compelling, magical world, based on imperial China, with just enough there to tickle the imagination, allowing the reader to dream a little. Here you’ll find talking birds, ghosts, magic, and some pointed commentary on feudalism and colonization, all wrapped up in a fairy tale of the kind you tell around a campfire at night.

The Teller

I spent some time this week playing around with Midjourney, working on a specific challenge to come up with pieces that felt like they fell into the uncanny valley—that off-putting feeling one feels when experiencing something just on the edge of being human. It was a fun way to explore style and prompting in ways I’d never thought about, and I came up with quite a few weird—and a few wonderfully creepy—results.

This one was my favorite. I call it “The Teller”, and it was an attempt to recreate a memory of seeing a 1960’s era animatronic display. I don’t remember exactly where I saw it; there are several places—Disney, some World War 2 era military museums—but I remember the feeling of seeing the display and being creeped out by it. I think it was the first time I’d heard the term “uncanny valley” and it’s stuck with me, even if the specifics of time or place have not. Memory is a strange thing, and I don’t fully trust my own, especially for things from a long, long time ago.